I Fail at Woman

So today I was once again reminded how forgettable I am and how much I fail at life. And once again it is to do with a girl... or lack of girl.

(I even gave her one of these premium mice)

I got a call from one of the employees saying that their mouse had gone faulty and they needed a replacement. She sounded familiar so I looked her up and saw that she was actually a girl I knew. She was actually the last girl I almost dated. I knew her sister and she introduced us and we hung out a couple of times and kind of hit it off but it never went any further than that.

That was something like 5 years ago and I have not had a girlfriend between then and now.

Anyway I remembered her and for some reason was sure she would remember me if she saw me, so I told her to drop by my desk with the faulty mouse and I will give her a new one (I even gave her one of the premium mice... it has more buttons and everything!).

So she comes past and I can immediately tell she has no idea who I am. So, being the idiot I am, I start with the "Hey, you look familiar" crap... she does not buy it and I can tell she is thinking I'm some douche trying to hit on her. She gives me the "Oh, you've probably just seen me around before or something" and tries to escape, but no! I can not let her get away now... not until she remembers me. Now I am determined to get her to remember me.
As she turns to run away from me I say "Hey wait a sec... what's your surname?" I immediately think 'why the fuck would she give me her surname, now she thinks I want to e-stalk her or something.' But by now she is a deer in the headlights and does not know what to do, so she tells me her surname and I say "Isn't your sister (insert sisters name here)?"
"... Um... Yes..."
"Oh yeah... I used to hang out with her... back in the day..."
"......"
"......"
>.>
<.<
And after a shitload of awkward silence and looking around at nothing she turns around and walks away, and I am left standing there, once again thinking about how much I fail at women.

Oh, and she clearly did not remember me after all that.

Work Placement Kid

So for this week at work there is a work placement kid with us. He looks so young and innocent and awkward... I want to pull some pranks on him!

Basicaly this is just a shout out to anyone who can come up with same funny pranks to pull on this kid (non life threatening pranks). If you have any cool ideas please post them in the comments and I will try to do them and post the results. I work in the IT department of a local government but the pranks don't have to be limited to computer realted stuff. He is here for the next 5 days so there is a bit of time to come up with some ideas. If I come up with any of my own I will post them in the comments too.

A pink t-shirt

At my work, fridays are considered a casual day where people can dress in a more relaxed manner such as t-shirts and jeans or shorts if it's warm enough. I have a fascination with having to wear all of the clothing I own and when I see something in my wardrobe that I have not worn for a while I feel a compulsion to wear it. Today it was a pink t-shirt. I only own one pink t-shirt and it deserves to be worn damit!

When I put it on I was sure it looked sensible and not over the top and something along the lines of this:

But the moment I walked into the office my opinion of myself changed instantly and I had a feeling that when people looked at me what they saw was something more along the lines of this:

I think I look like a douche... I mean, the t-shirt does not even have a collar, I am not wearing a cap, I don't have a fake tan or any tattoos or anything, but everyone I look at that looks back at me gives me the distinct feeling that in their head I must be the biggest fucking douche on the planet...

... I guess what I am saying is I should wear this pink t-shirt more often.